A friend recently responded to a lunch jaunt near Wall Street (Stone Street - know it?) during which we scrounged for the best slab of beef we could find in the immediate area (notwithstanding terrible service and unavailable bankers - where have they all gone?), saying “…I think I opened up a floodgate. That burger was uber tasty, and now I can’t stop thinking about it. That’s what I get for living with a vegan, eh?”

yeah. I love meat. can’t live without it (at least for now, until it becomes so vile I have no choice - but it’s a billion dollar industry, so I doubt that will be happening in our lifetime). In fact, I had a burger for din-din the other night at AteAve on 8th Ave with a friend from Zurich who was held up by torrential flash floods in the Grand Canyon-ish. It was so tasty. I had it with whole grain bread and “dirty” fries — the ones with the skins left on. And I had it topped with bacon and avocado. Twice the spice is twice as nice, I always say.

So I told her, “I am up for a burger anytime. If you find the veganness cannot be tamed, you are welcome to call. BLT Burger is also a great slab of beef (6th Ave just below 14th Street).”

Don’t all flock there at once. I hate to have to wait for my meat.

This comment was left at my PS1 “public farm” post. Read it, then check out my response.

As a big supporter of the Warmup series and the great art that PS1 supports and exhibits I am thoroughly disappointed at the hypocrisy that goes on outside the venue each Saturday…

read what’s next

hilarious.

Lambda Legal’s first debate on OpposingViews.com has to do with marriage for same-sex couples. Lambda Legal goes head-to-head with Alliance Defense Fund, the same outfit we debated on LA Times’ Dust Up back in May. They are really good sources for people who want to get in on the marriage debate, but who feel a bit inundated with all the hype and flurry of opinions going out there. ADF represents the opposition pretty well, I think, showing the flaws of religious conservative power-play in broad daylight.

Funny how fundamentalist Christians seem to use the same logic for this as they did for interracial marriage decades ago.

What’s really great about this new site (it launched yesterday), is that it welcomes viewpoints from both sides of any given issue (hot topics that include global warming, the economy, Obama vs. McCain, gun control, meat consumption, and capital punishment, to name a few), and lets the public weigh in with comments. The experts (Lambda Legal, Alliance Defense Fund, for instance) battle it out in a constructive, organized way, citing evidence to back up their claims.

This site is a great example of how the Internet can be used to genuinely inform the public, without touting a particular agenda. (Or maybe I should say, touting several agendas and letting the public choose…)

• Check out the marriage debate
• Read the Tech Crunch article

They say a sane person living in an insane world must be insane. And if what they say is true, then Terry Goldie should be admitted immediately.

Despite not having sex with a man until age 22, Goldie has had a lifetime of sexual experience to draw from, and as a professed homosexual (at least, for now) who has also had numerous sexual experiences with women, this intellectual should abhor labels. But in his latest work queersexlife: Autobiographical Notes on Sexuality, Gender & Identity, Goldie suggests that we might be better off with more of them, noting Grosz’s observation of how “the simple binary of sex and gender has resolutely failed.”

Call him gay, call him straight; just don’t call him “in-between.” Goldie is quick to discount bisexuality as a “false concept…an identity for those who are primarily willing to assert an identity but are actually still on the road to their true identity,” calling it a situation that “consistently confuses” him. Perhaps it is a clear illustration of his “inability to see the hidden side” of his sexuality using self-analysis. Maybe he doesn’t want to be pigeonholed, or perhaps his loathing of the term reflects a distaste for things lukewarm. Or perhaps it’s because “the very idea of ’bisexual’ seems to belie a monogamous heterosexual or homosexual relationship,” a concept derived from our society’s “penguin-like faith in the couple, regardless of how few couples seem able to keep the faith.”

queersexlife reads like a history lesson infused with social theory that screams “I told you so,” as, for example, when Goldie nonchalantly shoots down the notion of “gay recruitment” and recognizes the non-masculine boy, or “sissy boy,” as a constant target. Simply put, Goldie blows “normative” thinking out of the water by immersing us in dinge queens, drag queens, intersex and anal sex –taking the “personal memoir” approach to academia to a whole new level.

Particularly enlightening are Goldie’s notes on the homosexual child, bisexuality, and the chapter entitled “Dinge Queens and Racists,” in which he discusses politically appropriate desire, illustrating how homosexuality is “clearly a force of racism” and noting how, in some cases, difference in race may be a way of “using race to reproduce the relationship as ’hetero.’” Regardless of whether or not you are fascinated by Goldie’s ability to smoothly discuss subjects most modern day scholars would choke on, the considerable unearthing of scholarship in queersexlife should, in itself, be reason to take this work seriously.

But the question here isn’t really about whether or not Terry Goldie’s brand of pragmatism preaches to the masses. The words contained in this instant classic (and perhaps soon-to-be seminal work) are for those willing to shed their heterosexual conditioning for a moment and delve into the dense and ever-evolving subculture that challenges the status quo at every turn. That might be why, as Goldie points out, “even sophisticated thinkers seem to offer answers too simple to be satisfying.”

Read my review on Edge

A cut-and-paste job from ACLU. Give it a read, anyway:

Did you know that Congress has signed away our right to privacy?

It’s true! By making FISA law, the President and Congress have made it legal for US agencies to spy on our text messages, email, and phone calls to people outside the US, without any cause, reason or warrant. Does that sound like a right to privacy to you?

Help the ACLU overturn FISA by sharing your message of support now!

Take Action

PS1 Warmup tomorrow, Saturday, July 19! It’s gonna be a bash. Let’s resume the good times we continued last summer! We’re meeting up sometime around 4pm-ish in the main courtyard. An afternoon of friends, art and great beats. DON’T MISS OUT.

This summer’s concept goes green - keep reading for more (click below to go to t_a_i_s on Flickr):

From Dexigner:

PF1 (Public Farm One) is an urban farm concept that evokes the look of a flying carpet landing in the P.S.1 courtyard. Constructed from large cardboard tubes, its top surface will be a working farm, blooming with a variety of vegetables and plants. The structure will create a textured, colorful, and constantly changing surface in contrast with P.S.1’s angular concrete and gravel courtyard.

MoMA we love you, xoxo.

Last weekend, Jose and I and six friends took a 2-day, 30-mile canoe trip down the Delaware River, from Dingman’s Falls to the Delaware Water Gap. Jose, you’re the BEST CANOE PARTNER EVER!! xoxo

It was great to get away from Gotham for a little while, but the best part of the trip was getting into nature. We saw deer, jumping fish, hawks, (and eels) — the bugs weren’t as bad as I thought they would be. There’s something about the sound of water, I feel, that’s therapy for the soul. Several times, when the breezed stopped, it became so silent I just had to stop to take it all in.

And it sure was a workout! Mostly, the Delaware has calm, shallow water, but there were a few points when the wind kicked up and the water got a bit deeper, forcing us to put our backs into it. The only thing that was truly “roughing it” for me was the “toilet” situation (even though the Worthington State Forest composting system is amazing). Check out the map of our route below - click for a larger view.

Glorious weather both days, couldn’t ask for more. The second we got everything loaded back in the cars once we got back, the sky got dark and opened up for a minute. It felt good to miss that. Don’t know how I would have felt canoeing in the rain! We’re planning another trip for end of summer. I’d recommend this route to anyone, really. Class I rapids are completely manageable, and the views are breathtaking.

If anyone has any river/camping stories, feel free to share!

Check out my Flickr pics.

If you’ve never been to Provincetown to celebrate Independence Day, well, you should go. The crowds can be intimidating, sure, but there really is no other sense of gay communion like it; beach-bum homos from every corner of the world converge during P-town’s busiest week of the year on the narrow sickle-shaped stretch of land that was once a fishing village and has since been home to legendary authors, filmmakers, drag queens and artists.

There’s a reason why this place is so hot. There’s a sort of charm that pulls you into a queer neutral zone, where gays and straights, families, couples and singles all mingle like some Biblical vision of lions and lambs sharing green pastures. Only this time the angels are sunbathing and the horns and harps are traded in for vinyl on turntables.

Provincetown is magical. I’ve spent time there all throughout the year, and can honestly say Arthur P. Richmond’s Provincetown Perspectives captures, in photos, the essence of the quaint New England town that harbors memories for many the moment they step out of the car or plane, or off the boat. Because there is something truly disarming about a narrow sickle-shaped sliver of land in the middle of nowhere that allows you to be yourself, to enjoy time with friends, to get to know the locals without worrying about fitting in or fagging out.

Alright, you get the point. But is this book any good? Richmond’s 9 x 8 paperback turns like a postcard book, and at $9.99 you shouldn’t expect art anthology quality. The captions are a bit stodgy and a few images are actually out of focus. But the aerial and beach shots are enough reason to grab it for your bookshelf at home. The author has been involved with photography for over 45 years and at least one photo is a testament to that (what model car is that in the picture?). But seriously, where else can you find a postcard shot of that old guy who plays the creepy organ on Commercial Street?

From a “pride” standpoint, there could be more “gay-friendly” material, but in the end, this book does what it is designed to do: take you back and let your imagination do the rest. Or, if you want to really make it that special souvenir (for you or your host), leave it in your cottage’s common area and have your guests write provocative notes in the margins.

Check out my Flickr set

Read my July 8 review on Edge

There’s a mighty big uproar happening out in Arizona over the legitimacy of same-sex parenting. Alright, I may be exaggerating, but it seems as if parenting — just like marriage — may be just one more of society’s failures some straights are unwilling to give up. I say, when someone throws you a life raft, you take it. Keep reading.

I just came back from a weekend in DC. Fireworks were good (they’re always too short and the crowds just get bigger) and it was nice to see family. My nephew Cameron is getting bigger and he’s talking a lot more. His personality is really coming alive. Since he was born in 2003, on occasion I’ve wondered what it would be like to have my own kid. Although I can’t see that happening anytime soon, I may eventually be interested in extending my family and providing for another. But if this “what-if” became reality, how would I do it? Surrogate mother? Artificial insemination of a friend? As it turns out, after careful consideration I am more fond of the adoption route.

Which leads me to consider the horrors of the foster care system, especially for LGBT youth. Foster care can be especially traumatizing for them. Think about all of the times you hear parents say they’ve accepted their child (or have “no choice” but to accept them) because they are “flesh and blood.” No doubt, there is a special connection (and consideration) that comes along when blood becomes the determining factor. But what happens to  a child who doesn’t have that edge? To the child who doesn’t have the benefit of the unconditional love that comes from most flesh-and-blood parents?

While this is a mere margin of what parentless children (gay or straight) face, it’s important to consider a prospective parent’s ability to cope with the unknown. I’m sure that in the realm of parenting, nothing is worse than a “curve ball” — something your child does or says or thinks that isn’t quite your idea of what “normal” should be. How many of us go into casual situations with expectations that influence our choices and attitudes? Is parenting exempt? Probably not. So it’s safe to say we take our biases and prejudices there as well. But until I decide whether or not to raise children of my own, the only truth I have to go by is that many couples decide for one reason or another, after having children, to drop their responsibilities and feed their flesh and blood to the wolves. Is child-rearing a privilege to be legislated in favor of different-sex couples? Can same-sex couples, if given the chance, do a better job at raising kids? Those are the questions that dominate this latest controversy in Arizona.

On July 1, the Arizona Daily Star ran an AP piece on a NY same-sex couple who was barred from posting an adoption profile on an Arizona-based website. Even though Rosario Gennaro and Alexander Gardner were certified by a court as qualified adoptive parents, they weren’t allowed to use the service because, according to ParentProfiles.com — a service of Adoption Profiles, LLC — applicants were required to be “husband and wife.”

Meanwhile, Lambda Legal filed a discrimination complaint with the New York attorney general’s office on behalf of the couple. According to the Lambda Legal website, “Adoption Profiles was sued in California in 2004 for violating that state’s antidiscrimination law and, as a result, is no longer doing business there. Now it may need to pull its business from New York State as well.”

The comments that follow the Arizona Daily Star article represent the sense of trepidation some heterosexuals have when it comes to allowing same-sex couples to parent children. So I picked out the few I thought were worthy of correction and responded accordingly. Here are a couple of those followed by my (”C.D. Informed74″) replies:

35. Comment by I V. (TypicalBitterWhitePerson)–July 1,2008 @ 6:10PM

Plain and simple, it boils down to this: ‘We reserve the right to refuse service to anyone.’ That is the policy of nearly every business in this country. e-harmony won’t allow me to create a profile because I am divorced. I’m not going to sue or even complain about it. I just won’t use their service. That’s the beauty of America. Freedom to choose where you do business. Don’t fuss and gripe. Just keep looking till you find an agency that will work with you.

40. Comment by Sharon H. (sharon455)–July 1,2008 @ 10:31PM

oh waaaaahh!! some mean company wouldn’t let me post my profile! I refuse to use on the 1000 other agencies available to me. I demand that THIS company bow to my demands! I think I’ll tell the press so they can blow things out of proportion and I can slip in under the requirements just so they can make this all go away. Oh, Boo Hoo, poor me. I’m single and I can’t use many agencies to adopt. Maybe I should find a soapbox to whine from too.

MY REPLY: 41. Comment by C D. (informed74)–July 2, 2008 @ 9:38AM

To Sharon H (#40) and I V (#35): It is important in the private sector that discrimination be checked and dealt with. The Arizona-based adoption company need not change its practices. But if a state has a non-discrimination policy and the company still chooses to discriminate (for whatever reason), that state has the right to prevent that company from doing business there. Taht’s what this is all about. If you feel you are being treated unfairly (which it sounds like you do), then get some balls (both of you) and make your case. Otherwise, shut up.

Then, there was this:

7. Comment by Suzanne L. (SuzCorner)–July 1,2008 @ 1:33PM

The same thing that is wrong with single-parent adoptions is what is wrong with gay adoptions. Wy should the agency PLAN on putting a child into a motherless or fatherless situation? Children need both male and female parents. They should not be somebody’s poster child for a politically correct world. Sure sometimes life dishes crumbs, but there’s no reason to deliberately feed crumbs to a child, by deliberately making him motherless or fatherless.

36. Comment by Mary B. (maximaxine)–July 1,2008 @ 6:28PM

I agree with Suzanne 100%! Homosexual couples might be loving care-givers, but the most ideal situation is for children to have both a male and female parent.

MY REPLY: 41. Comment by C D. (informed74)–July 2,2008 @ 9:53AM

To Mary B. (#36) and Suzanne (#7): I’d like to learn about your family histories and upbringing. That might shed some light on your gravitation to antiquated ideals. Having a male body and a female body present in a household, in itself, is simply not enough. Mothers and fathers are not the only role models. The functional “family” is evolving; from extended nuclei to surrogate educators and nurturers. Homosexuals did not start this trend. We are only adapting to the world around us. The important thing for any parent is to give their child guidance and support and the necessary tools (in and outside the family) to maximize that child’s potential, to teach him or her to give back to society, and the educate and protect others. If those are things your parents gave you, then I applaud your efforts (you’re still wrong). But if your intent is to make the world an “ideal” place, stop now. And allow yourself to evolve.

All 43 comments can be viewed following the Arizona Daily Star article, although you may need to register a free account with the website to get access.

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